To What Extent Is Self Exposure Appropriate?

The more she tried to hide from me, the more I wanted to avoid her, and Han Tian was a student in my graduate school, not a dormitory relationship, but I knew her story of catching up with her boyfriend, and her story said that the whole school was not famous.

Soon after she entered school, she shocked me.

One morning, I had a big class. During the first session, I sat in the front row during the class break. She turned around and borrowed notes from me. When I returned, I took a picture of a boy and opened a conversation, saying that she was a new boyfriend on the train and was in love.

Where did she rent a house from her boyfriend? What kind of food did she buy yesterday, who cooked dinner, how she was happy, and even talked about two little intimate details in the world...

At the beginning of the second class, I haven't come back.

Normally, I and Han Tian are not a mentor, and I have few contacts. How did she suddenly say so much to me?

I sometimes have a desire to talk, but that's a good friend. How can I bring someone to talk?

Besides, there are so many people in the class, there are so many people around, and there are boys and girls in the class.

I was shocked by some of the details, and I really didn't know how to give it back to her. I could only sit there like wood. Occasionally I smiled awkwardly with her four eyes. Oh, oh, two times.

During the second break, I saw her turn around to say something, and hurriedly said she wanted to buy breakfast and wanted to slip away, but she insisted on coming with me.

On the way, she was carrying my arm next to me.

This makes me uncomfortable again.

I am not used to being close to other people except my relatives and my best friends.

When you say that others are talking about themselves, they should feel friendly, but how can I feel uncomfortable?

I usually talk to my good friends about things at home, but that's when I become a good friend.

Is Han Tian so kind to me that she thinks I can be trusted and wants to become good friends with me?

I explained to myself this way, but I still had a strange feeling. It seemed that she forced me to accept her. I had no right to choose her distance from her. I must be unconditionally and become her "close friend".

In the evening, I talked with the little hostel in the dormitory, and she was very disapproving: "what she said to you is nothing, don't you know, the boy whom Han Tian has written to her has written many love letters, and has printed and booked it. No matter who it is, no need to say a few words, she can show it to you."

She could hide so much time that she could show so many people.

At that time, I thought she might just want to show off how happy her love was. She was younger than us, and the children would not defend themselves, so they would talk about themselves everywhere.

After two months, I went to Han Tian's dormitory to find another student. I saw a book on the bed in Han Tian's English. I asked him, "how did you look at it?" she said it was bought for her boyfriend, and he sat beside me and began to tell the story. She said she had met a new boy, the boy was younger than her, and now there were other girlfriends. But she could not put the boy away, and he went to see the boy's parents from a distance, hoping that they would persuade the boy to leave his present girlfriend.

Han Tian talked to me for nearly an hour, and he took out the diary love letter in the drawer and showed it to me. I turned over two pages. I really thought it was very gossip. Someone just came to look for her, and I hurried away.

In fact, I don't hate her, but I think she is ridiculous. From that day on, I'll try to avoid her seat in the big class.

At the beginning of two, I found that my classmates and teachers were divided into two extremes.

Another story told by everyone is Han's miserable childhood and family history.

"My parents divorced when I was very young, and I had to earn money to support myself.

I'm particularly afraid of getting married. What do you say I should do?

Her story touched many teachers, and they took special care of her, which gave her many good opportunities.

Later, she went to work in a big company that we all envy, and her teachers had made a lot of efforts.

Although we often get along with Han Tian, although we often hear her story, there are fewer and fewer people who sympathize with her.

Many students think that Han Tian is trying to find a job and deliberately misleads himself to win sympathy. She deliberately puts the pain into the biggest and definitely has a purpose.

Although I do not look at her like this, I think she will be very uncomfortable.

Han Tian is always weak in front of everyone. You will have pressure to get along with her.

Even if it is really bitter, is it necessary to mention it to everyone?

Perhaps she is too short to talk about things, but she can not readily accept the object of her time.

Sometimes I am forcing myself. People are already miserable and can not be impatient.

But in the end, I heard more about the story of misery, and I reduced her sympathy and closeness.

They wrapped up their defensive jackets and made it difficult for them to get close to them. People who wore all kinds of "protective clothing" and people could not see their hearts, their personalities, or even their daily trifles or published a little viewpoint.

It seems to you that there is always a small kernel in you, and you can't kick anything.

I and the fruit are gradually estranged by this annoying core.

We both entered the same unit in the same year, with similar age and similar hobbies.

At the beginning of the period, two people came together like twins, doing beauty, fitness, watching drama and going to the library. As long as one spoke, the other person felt exactly what she had always wanted to do.

That harmony is not something that can be described as "a mind with a sense of mind". So we agreed to change the phrase "one point to one" and "do not know anything about it".

Later, I gradually discovered that this kind of mental "no self regulation" is limited to matters not related to personal privacy.

After all, it is not even a matter of privacy at all. It is merely a statement of fact or a point of view, and this expression does not seem to me at all.

For example, one day we didn't have a meal together. When I came back, I asked her, "who are you having lunch with today?"

This is a joke, but the fruit is serious: "Oh, and the people outside."

When she saw her inconvenient, I did not ask.

But in the afternoon, I heard another female colleague say that they would have lunch together with fruit at noon.

I began to wonder: is there anything to hide?

I am not jealous of such trifles.

For example, when we drink tea, we discuss colleagues' personality problems and dressing taste.

I told him that I had made a personal point of view, who dressed too much, but in fact, the professional clothes were more sensible.

Then he asked the fruit: "what do you think?"

The children began to be vague and cautious in their wording: "in fact, individuals have personal preferences. There is nothing wrong or right.

Character is also natural, and adapt slowly.

A relaxed afternoon tea seems to be spent in fruit education, "I don't want to say that people are right and wrong". I am a bit angry: everyone is so familiar with that, judging others is nothing, and it is not a major event involving reputation.

She went back to talk with her boyfriend. Her boyfriend said, "you are childish and do not understand the rules of the workplace.

Where can I take heart from colleagues?

Be careful when others catch your pigtail.

Her boyfriend is also a self-protective person and likes to instil this idea into me.

When he saw his colleagues with his classmates, he felt that he always kept distance and dignity in front of others. He did not like to talk about personal matters, nor did he like to express his extreme views.

In fact, he is a person with a very distinct personality. Watching a little feature film can be highly critical.

But when it comes to public occasions, it is like a diplomat who can not find any position or defect.

"Hypocrisy!"

I protest.

"That's wise!"

He said that the more exposed you are, the more organic you will be to say that you are right and wrong, and that it may also affect your working relationship and circle of friends.

Of course, he doesn't like my mouth too much.

For example, I discussed my boyfriend with my close friend. If he knew it, he would stop it. Don't discuss it later. I will feel uncomfortable seeing you next time.

A few days ago, I took part in a psychological speech. The experts asked me to write five "your support system", that is, five people who are troubled with your help and others will help you solve problems.

I quickly wrote five, including mom and Dad, leaders, friends and colleagues.

After expert analysis, if your social support system is many yuan, not only limited to a range, then you are a very healthy interpersonal relationship, some people pour out trouble, and some people help solve.

I think of my boyfriend and let him do it.

As a result, one of his five support systems was me, and the other four were relatives.

I did the same thing as an expert. I analyzed the result and found that he was a little thoughtful.

Yesterday, I received a call from a long time ago: "I had a conflict with my neighbor this morning because of the leakage of water in the bathroom."

And then began to cry.

"So serious!

It's all neighborhoods. Why are they so stiff?

And I don't want to know what I used to be?

"There was nothing in the past, no words."

Guo said frankly.

"Did the other neighbors not advise?"

I raise doubts.

"Everyone passed by our house, and the probes were gone."

The fruit began to cry.

I think of her way of doing things. It's really hard to build intimacy with others.

This is not difficult to understand.

After all, people can survive in all kinds of circles and pack themselves too tightly. One result is that others can't hurt you, but what is more serious is that others can't get close to you either.

Usually do not extend a friendly hand to your neighbour friends to disarm. When it is difficult, no one will reach out to you.