Speaking Skills, Let You Struggle Less Than 20 Years!

The same thing, the same words, reversing the order, adjusting the tone, or changing the occasion will achieve different effects. Next, let's learn how to speak.

1. Praise Behavior rather than individual

For example, if the other side is a chef, don't say: you are a great cook. He knew that more chefs were better than him. But if you tell him that you will eat in his restaurant half a week, this is a very flattering compliment.

2, express the praise through the third party.

If the other person indirectly hears your compliments through others, you will have more pleasant surprises than you tell me directly. On the contrary, if we criticize the other party, we must not tell the parties through the third party, so as to avoid adding oil to the vinegar.

3, polite words should also be said to be right.

Polite words are meant to show your respect and gratitude. Someone has done a little bit for you, you just have to say thank you. I'm sorry to bother you with this. As for talent and learning, please enlighten your excellency. Such a lack of sentimental polite words can be avoided.

4, in the face of other people's praise, say thank you.

When the average person is praised, he usually answers well, or smiles. It's better to accept it frankly and say thank you directly to the other person. Sometimes the other side praises us. Clothes & Accessories Or something, if you say: This is just a bargain! It will embarrass the other party.

5, have the grace to appreciate competitors.

When your opponent or annoying person is praised, don't rush to say: but... Even if you don't agree with each other, it must be said: Yes, he worked very hard. Show your grace.

6, criticism also depends on the relationship.

Good advice is not necessarily against your ears. Even if you are kind, the other person may not appreciate it, or even misunderstand your kindness. Unless you have a certain friendship or trust basis with your partner, you should not criticize at will.

7, criticism can also be pleasing to the ear.

It's more acceptable to say: "about you... I have some ideas. Maybe you can listen to them. "

8, time is very important.

Never be on Monday morning. Almost everyone will have melancholy symptoms on Monday. And don't try to sabotage the weekend holiday before Friday's work.

9, pay attention to occasions.

Don't criticize your friends or colleagues in the face of strangers.

10, make recommendations at the same time.

Besides making criticism, you should also provide positive suggestions for improvement so that your criticism can be more convincing.

11, avoid the answers that should not be exported.

It looks like: No, it should be... It seems that you are trying to find fault. In addition, we often say: heard... It feels like a piece of news from your hearsay.

12, don't answer.

This is a bad idea. When the other person hears this response, he can't help thinking: do you know what to ask?

13, get rid of the useless mantra.

Everybody speak There is a habit of mantra, but it will be easily offensive. For example, do you know what I mean? Do you understand? To be honest...

14, remove unnecessary noise.

Some people used to add "ah" and other auxiliary words to each sentence at last, such as "ah," and, of course, on a more formal occasion, it would not be dignified and steady.

15, don't ask your partner what your company is doing.

When you meet someone in an activity, he introduces himself and says he works in a company. Do not ask: what does your company do? This activity may be held by their company. If you don't know, it will be embarrassing. Do not say: I heard you did a good job, because the other side may have lost 3 of the season's performance. You should say: what position do you hold in the company? If you don't know the other's occupation, don't ask, because he may not have a job.

16, don't ask unfamiliar people why.

If you don't have enough friendship, why do you ask the other person? Sometimes there are questions about asking for privacy. For example, why do you do that and why you make this decision?

17, don't think everyone knows you.

When you meet someone who has seen you, but you don't know much about it, never say, "do you remember me?" if you can't remember it, you will be embarrassed. The best way is to introduce yourself first: "Hello, I am * * *, it's nice to see you again."

18, refusing can be rude.

If your host recommends you to eat something you don't want to eat, you can say, "I'm sorry, I can't eat this dish, but I'll eat a little more..." let the other person feel that you really like it and thank them for the food they prepared. If you are full, you can say, "these dishes are delicious. If they are not full, I really want to eat a little more."

19, do not show that they are stronger than others.

When someone talks about a social occasion, if someone says he has just been to New York for 1 weeks, don't say that you went to 1 months last time, which would destroy the interest of the other party's conversation. It's better to share your feelings and affection for New York.

20, do not correct others' mistakes.

Do not be too chicken to correct other people's pronunciation, grammar or facts, not only will make the other feel embarrassed, but also you seem to love performance.

21, do not understand, do not pretend to understand

If you do not understand the topic of the conversation, then frankly, "I don't know the question." No one else will continue to embarrass you. If you don't understand and pretend to understand, it's easier to say wrong.

22, grasp the principle of 1 seconds.

Listen to someone else's conversation and stop for 1 seconds before answering. It means you have listened carefully. If you reply immediately, it will make you feel as if you have been waiting for interruption.

23, I heard that there was no export.

When you listen to someone, you only hear what the other person knows, and is willing to tell you. In addition to listening, we must also observe. How does he behave? What kind of work does he do? How to allocate time and money?

24, choose a reasonable opportunity.

When you have something to discuss with colleagues or supervisors, you should choose the right time according to the importance of your own problems. If it is for personal matters, do not disturb him when he is thinking deeply. If you don't know when the other person is free, you might as well write him first.

25. Smile and refuse to answer personal questions.

If you are asked questions that you don't want to answer or personal problems, smile to your partner and say, "I can't answer this question." It will not embarrass the other person, but also keep your bottom line.

26, beat around the Bush and refuse.

Drinking is always unavoidable in many social occasions. Don't just say, "I don't drink." Everybody's pleasure. It is better to say humorously: "I am better at pouring wine for everyone."

27, first report your name.

Forget the name of the other person as a formal occasion, introduce your name to the other person, or take out your business card. The other party will also report your name and business card on the way to avoid the embarrassment of not calling the other person's name.

28, improper gossip.

When a group of people gossip or gossip about a person, do not follow suit, because as long as exports, it will inevitably spread to the ears of the parties. The best way is not to show your position, just say, "I don't know much about what you said."

29, the order of delivery.

If you think it's time to end the conversation or send a visitor, but the other person doesn't seem to have any intention of leaving, he can say, "sorry, I have to call, it may be a little bit longer." Or, "thank you very much today." You can also look at your watch carelessly and let the other know that it is time to go.

30, let the other person think he is very important.

If you ask your predecessors for help, you can say, "because I trust you very much, so I want to talk with you." Let the other person feel respected.

31, direct description of the status quo

When you are different from your subordinates, do not criticize directly, but explain where the differences are.

32, seek solutions

If subordinates do not perform well, they should ask him how he can solve them and not take threats.

33, take the initiative to express help.

If you can't solve your subordinates' problems at a time, don't say "don't bother me in advance," but tell him, "I know who can help."

34, speaking tone should be equal.

The director should never say, "I have more than ten years of experience, and listen to me." A good saying is, "I've used this method and it's very effective. Would you like to try it?"

35, flexible acceptance of subordinates' opinions

Even if you have a definite mind, do not say to your subordinates: "these proposals have been considered, and there is no need to say more. "We should give the opportunity to our subordinates," he said to him, "I have an abdominal case on this issue, but I still want to hear your opinion."

Carnegie once said that about 15% of a person's success depends on knowledge and skills, and 85% depends on communication -- the ability to express his opinions and the ability to arouse others' enthusiasm. Indeed, people who are good at communication are often respected, loved and supported.