If It'S Not For Art, I Should Have Committed Suicide Very Early.

For an artist, suicide is not a very strange thing. For a neurotic audio-visual patient, it is very difficult to suppress suicide ideation.

However, art often gives real miracles. So far, we can see Japanese women artists who actively cooperate with each other and create more works.

I have always envied those people.

They are very close to their elders and have a group of intimate friends.

They are glamour, and everyone likes to get along with them.

After many attempts to please the people around us

But in the end, because of his stupidity, he has set up an eccentric character.

I don't know how much tears I left in the deep night.

If so

Don't force yourself to be so isolated.

Today is not an artist Kusama Yayoi, but a strange girl who never smiles.

Although she is known as the name of Japanese art queen, her works are loved and respected by people all over the world, but in most of her life, she is wrapped up in pain. This feeling does not come from the influence of the environment, but a kind of fatality and temperament.

A ten year old girl was gloomy and quiet, with no smile on her face.

The mother destroyed the canvas of the grass, condemned her to work with the workers, and often locked her up.

"Hitting me every day, kicking my ass", a strong sense of terror has left the spirit of weeds between grass close to collapse.

In 1957, she received a visa to the United States. Before leaving, her mother gave 1 million yen to the grass and told her never to enter the house.

When she left, she destroyed thousands of works on the riverbank outside her home to express her anger at her mother.

In the future novel "the Rehmanniae of Central Park", Cao Weicheng presented his early experience through describing a Japanese girl's experience in New York: lonely, poor, penniless, still not planning to return to Japan; she was shuttling between the galleries of the city with her own paintings; because she did not understand English, the little, unattractive Oriental woman sold a piece of work was extremely difficult; in the rental apartment, she would wake up in the middle of the night and paint until dawn; picked up fish heads and discarded rotten leaves in the garbage basket on the street, and cooked a bowl of hot soup with these materials.

In the future novel "the Rehmanniae of Central Park", Cao Weicheng presented his early experience through describing a Japanese girl's experience in New York: lonely, poor, penniless, still not planning to return to Japan; she was shuttling between the galleries of the city with her own paintings; because she did not understand English, the little, unattractive Oriental woman sold a piece of work was extremely difficult; in the rental apartment, she would wake up in the middle of the night and paint until dawn; picked up fish heads and discarded rotten leaves in the garbage basket on the street, and cooked a bowl of hot soup with these materials.

It has been speculated that the grass between the birth of himself into a mental sanatorium, is a self punishment after the death of his wife.

She regretted the frenzied action to win fame, and should concentrate more on her works.

Every morning, the Shinjuku mental sanatorium, assisted by an assistant, slowly went out between the 80 year old grass.

She has lived in New York for more than 30 years since returning to Tokyo from 1973.

During the day, she went to work in the nearby studio and returned to the sanatorium in the evening.

She rarely goes out and seldom meets guests. She doesn't go to department stores, she doesn't use computers and cell phones, she lives in isolation.

Although people love her works, few people think that she is living a happy life, mixed with many helplessness and pain, but still living in their own way. It is a brave choice and a loyal choice.

It's easy to be an artist who works all night. It's not easy to be an artist who is determined to devote himself to art.

From her brief life history, her contribution to art is not only reflected in her works, but also reflected in her life, her ideas and her influence on modern art.

But in her words, "I am just a psychic artist."

Course of works:

In 1939, when he was about 10 years old, he began to be troubled by a lot of hallucinations. He often had suicidal attempts.

She left pencils painted for her mother at that time, and the paintings were filled with small circles.

In 1954, there was the following expression in the painting "D.S.P.S": "I looked at the patterns on the red tablecloth one day and began to look around for the same pattern, from the ceiling, windows, walls to every corner of the house, and finally my body and universe.

In the process of finding, I feel that I have been obliterated, and I have been spinning around with infinite time and absolute sense of space. I have become small and insignificant.

In 1957, he moved to the United States, mostly in New York, and began to have the "Queen of the avant-garde".

In 1962, the seven artists' exhibition was held at the green gallery in New York. The exhibition was a soft sculpture. The artists included Andy Wohl and Claes Oldenbrg.

In 1966, LoveForever, using the infinite reflector of small bulb and large mirror, created quite a visual and psychedelic work, which is a famous work among the grass.

It was invited to the thirty-third Venice Biennale in the year.

The name is "the garden of Narcissus" (NarcissusGarden).

In 2003, Japan and the United States launched a long circuit retrospective exhibition.

And awarded the Chevalier de l'Ordre des Arts et des lettres by the French Ministry of culture.

Today, she lives in the psychotherapy Institute in Tokyo, and continues her artistic career at the age of more than 70. Her studio is not far from her treatment. She used to do so.

"If it's not for art, I should have committed suicide very early," he said.