How To Deal With Difficult Colleagues

In an ideal laboratory, all kinds of smart and capable people should be gathered. They live in harmony and study together to discuss scientific problems.

If your lab is described like that, you are lucky enough.

Because most people are experimentation in narrow and crowded rooms, there is always one person who challenges your patience or is difficult to get along with.

It is these so-called "hard to get along" people whose attitude and behavior will ruin your experiment and future.

You might as well look for it from your lab or department (of course you can look at the mirror!) to see if there are any of these types of people who may ruin your future or self-esteem.

1. "research stars" (or "research cattle"): "research cows" always seem to be able to easily and quickly succeed, at least he thinks so, and has a matching ambition.

At the group meeting, he could always live in hold and show off his success and belittle others' contributions.

And your boss gives him the best subjects and high attention and praise.

2. "energizer Bunny" (Note: a battery name in North America): this person seems to live in the lab, just like an unstoppable generator.

Whether you arrive in the lab in the morning or leave the lab in the evening, he is there.

He seems to have done two times more experiments than others.

If he did not laugh at those who did not work as hard as he did, that would be good.

3. "stealth bomber": "stealth bomber" always strikes without warning.

When he meets in a group or department, he sits in the middle, making fun of your recent failed experiments or making mistakes in the laboratory.

Stealth bombers can control the audience well, but they only love to attack others.

4. "all know Sir": this person can tell you how to do this experiment in a correct way without any stimulation, or arrogantly claim that what you have done is wrong.

He took the suction gun from your hand and said his mantra: "come and come, I will tell you."

5. "I am so tragedies": this person is always complaining.

He thought that everything in his life should be in his favor.

When the progress of the experiment is not smooth, the relationship with the boss is in a mess, personal life is having problems, laboratory instruments are very bad, and so on.

This person will be complaining.

6. "Bumblebee": this person may be more like a lab owner.

He would be furious at all without any reason or doubt, challenge or annoyed.

You and the rest of the lab will be scared and afraid that he will suddenly give you a disgusting look.

7. "a thief who goes all the way": he borrows your instrument and uses your experience and technology to get idea with your brain. However, when you need help, he refuses to give support.

When he succeeds, he will say that all this is done by himself.

8. "who, me?": this man seems to have difficulty remembering his task.

When you have decided to work on a topic together, you have allocated it.

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But when it comes to the summary of the work, he will say, "who, me? Ordering these supplies and calibrating this machine? Are these all the experiments I should do?"

Perhaps you usually turn the other side face to let people fight, but also at all costs to calm the storm.

If so, your strategy is not enough to deal with these "hard to get along" people so far.

In laboratories, it is unavoidable to avoid them sometimes and evading them will only make things worse.

They continue to go their own way, and you will only feel more and more uncomfortable, and finally become resentment.

It may be another option to give this question to your boss or someone else, but remember that not everyone is a competent manager.

So how do you deal with a "hard to get" person? Every type of person needs different ways, but you can also do simple things to distract the tension.

When communicating with those "research cows", you can easily be in a defensive position, and think, "why does he get all the attention?" even though, in this case, the best response is not to respond.

Because confrontation can lead to escalation, and you will only become a powerful enemy.

When you are alone with your boss, don't express your dissatisfaction with the arrogance of the cattle people. Criticism will make you look like sour grapes.

Second, concentrate on great work.

When you submit your own excellent papers, peer reviews do not know or care about the arrogance of "research cows".

Only work and papers can be recognized in the final stage, so make sure your work is top notch.

As for the "stealth bomber", you can say: "I noticed that you were habitually asking questions in my group at the meeting.

I know that this will make the discussion richer, but I feel that it would be better if I raised these questions myself.

The advantage of this method is that by explaining why an act makes you feel uneasy, let him know that what you do is not right.

In a direct and ingenious way, the stealth bomber can make a face and let him see your own point of view.

This method also allows the "stealth bomber" to know that you are very concerned about what he is doing.

Every time he does this, you deal with it until he stops.

To deal with people who are grouchy, you can try to listen in a neutral position instead of complaining and contributing to such a vicious cycle.

For example, when he is complaining, you admit to nodding your head and make a neutral statement: "well, I am sorry to hear that."

Give him 2 minutes to complain about how bad everything is, and then move to the problem solving mode.

You can say, "your instrument is broken, it will make it difficult for you to do experiments. What are you going to do?" in short, we should gather more "positive energy" instead of endless complaints.

When dealing with a strong Hornet, the best way to deal with his rage is to do nothing.

In some cases, it's best to let him roar alone. You just have to keep calm and think about other things. When he is finished, he will go away.

Or, depending on the situation, you can suggest that when he is ready to talk calmly, he will discuss this question again.

By adopting a Zen method instead of letting his bad temper deteriorate, you may not become his angry target again.

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In a fierce laboratory atmosphere, everyone tries to become an expert.

Under such circumstances, "all know Sir" will stimulate you and make you feel unhappy.

One way to deal with them is to agree with everything he says.

Nod your head thoughtfully, and then put forward your own ideas and opinions in a rhetorical way. "It sounds good to do this in your way, but you have considered...

"

For "energizer Bunny", even if he is in the lab 16 hours a day and running marathon on weekends, so what if it's not your style?

Have your own positive attitude and do not belittle yourself because your work is different from the rhythm of others.

You will find a clever one.

Let the energizer rabbit know that your work is equally important for you and his work. It may help you.

If you know clearly, you will not be intimidated by his pay or output. You may even win his respect.

Finally, look at your response when dealing with a "hard to get" person.

Are you defensive, angry, scared, or angry? Or can you ignore it? You need to interact with these people, mostly based on your confidence in your work.

It takes time to build confidence, but when you begin to accumulate more and more successful experiences and publish articles after another, other people's attitudes and behaviors are becoming less and less affected by you.

Keep in mind that people who are "difficult to get along" often derive from their inner fear.

After all, you can't really change the behavior of another person. Ultimately, what you can do is change the way you deal with it.

Therefore, set up your own work goals and not be influenced by others.

It's never easy to work with people who are hard to get along with.

But in your career, especially in highly competitive laboratories, you can learn how to deal with these people as soon as possible, which will bring you useful experience in interpersonal communication and manage your skills.

No matter where you go, it will help you.