Interpersonal Communication: Friendship Does Not Reject Utilitarianism.

Interpersonal psychologists believe that mutual benefit is a basic principle of interpersonal communication.

Our society advocates the spirit of dedication and altruism, but this is the highest level of interpersonal communication. It is difficult for all people to do this.

Why do people need to interact with people?

Although each person has different motivations for communication, the most basic motivation is to meet some of their needs from the target audience.

In fact, mutual benefit in human communication is also in line with our social ethics.

The so-called "mutual benefit" principle includes both material and spiritual aspects.

Influenced by traditional ideas, people used to be more willing to talk about human relationships in the past and taboo about utilitarianism.

In fact, people's interpersonal needs are multilayered and roughly divided into two basic levels: one is interpersonal orientation directed by emotion, such as family affection, friendship and love; the other is utilitarian oriented interpersonal communication, that is, to achieve certain utilitarian purposes.

In reality, people often consciously or unconsciously intertwined the two situations.

Sometimes communication with utility purpose can also cause people to communicate and react with each other. Sometimes, though emotional communication, they will also bring mutual help and support to each other's material interests.

Moreover, in various kinds of contacts, people sometimes meet the material needs and sometimes satisfy the spiritual needs.

In other words, the most basic motive of interpersonal communication is to get the satisfaction of their needs from the partners.

This kind of satisfaction is both spiritual and material.

Therefore, according to the principle of mutual benefit, people actually adopt the strategy of both emotional and utilitarian.

Whether it is emotional or utilitarian, since interpersonal communication is mutually beneficial and to meet the needs of both sides, there is a necessary condition for the continuity of interpersonal communication: the balance between the needs and needs of the two parties must be maintained.

Otherwise, interpersonal communication will be interrupted.

That is to say, the development of interpersonal communication can only be carried out under the condition of balanced demand and equal interests.

People often complain that friends lack friendship or even friendship.

As a matter of fact, complaining is often caused by a lack of satisfaction in one's needs, which is often utilitarian.

Therefore, we do not have to pursue the so-called "friendship without any utilitarian" blindly, nor do we have to lightly complain that others do not have "friendship".

We only need to frankly admit that mutual benefit is a basic principle of interpersonal communication; it is a conventional strategy for interpersonal interaction to both emotional and utilitarian; the balance of needs and equal interests is a necessary condition for interpersonal communication.

Of course, except saints.

The problem is that we are mostly mortals.

It is to be a saint, or to be a saint first, rather than to be a saint before others.

Therefore, when there are obstacles in communication between friends, we should first look at what is wrong with interpersonal communication.

What do you say?